Some days I’m ashamed of our house. {Sorry house}
Other days I’m pretty sure our house is ashamed of me.
The house and I? We have a love-hate relationship. Some days more hate than love.
You see, it’s not really my house. I’m a renter. There, I said it. I’m a thirty-seven-year old, long time married woman with three kids and I’ve never owned a home. Did you get that? I have never owned any kind of land beneath my feet, white picket fence or a red front door. {I dream of a bright red front door}.
Pete and I have lived in three different countries and gypsied around so much that at first we never wanted to own a home. Then when we wanted to, we had no easy work history, since so much of it was overseas. And then, well, yes, there was the issue of debt to credit ratio.
So we’re renters.
And for years it made me feel like a dork who would never be a “real” grown up. Because “real” grown ups owned homes and planned renovations and didn’t get intimidated by the Home Depot. And our rental, well, she’s reliable, but she sure ain’t pretty. She’s small and has faux bricks in the kitchen that constantly come unglued, barely there counter space, and a mosquito infestation for a back yard.
After a while I started to feel as small on the inside as my house was on the outside.
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My friend, the Nester, invited me to share the rest of my renter’s journey over at her place; I’m so thrilled to do so, because my house dreams of growing up to be like hers one day. And she’s a grown up with three boys and is a renter too. Add to that the fact that Nester has about the bestest, quirkiest sense of humor of anyone on the net these days, and it was an invitation impossible to say no to.
So come on over, won’t you? And be sure and let her know Lisa-Jo brought ya!
{Just click the below logo that I totally swiped from her blog!}
Dear Gypsy Mama,
I think I recall you posting about this before and I just want to say again–my big ole’ house note makes me wish we were renters sometimes. Lots of times. Your pics make me smile. Make me want my house to be more of a “home”. So thanks for keepin’ it real!
Our fifth child was the first one born in a home that we owned. I completely know where you’re coming from. Just be thankful you have flexibility now. We bought our house before the market went bust. We probably couldn’t get the same amount that we paid for it now, and since we’ve been here over five years, our loan is adjustable now. It gets recalculated again the first of August, and that’s scary.
Do you love your home right now and know you can stay there for awhile? Or do you wish you could move into a bigger, nicer, rented house? My thoughts on remaining in the one you’re in is just go ahead and make it like you would like it. Ask the owner if he would sell it to you, he knows your payment history and maybe he’ll finance it for you. In any event, times in real estate are very very sad. I don’t know where you live, but in some places the prices haven’t come up any at all. Stay in a strong cash position, or get yourself into that place of security. One cannot buy even a foreclosure without good credit. Or maybe you can find a home that the owner will finance for you with a 10% down payment 4% interest note for 15 years…that way you would own the house outright in 15 years.
I used to be in the real estate business in Houston, so I do know what I’m talking about.
Don’t be sad. Sometimes renting is the best financial move you can make. Especially if you’re still young. Sending a big hug from Texas…….
Girl, I am sooo with you! We have rented for years and did own a home once long before we realized we, too, would be gypsying around the U.S. When we struggled to sell it then had to have renters in it ourselves while we were renting across the country, well…we decided not to buy again until we were truly, surely settled. And here we are, almost five years later…still renting! I am thankful for the flexibility it has allowed us, but I do greatly share your thoughts and longings…often. Even the ones that say, “Be thankful. Be content.” I am. Most days. :)
I feel like I found a kindred spirit this morning! Another renter here, just doing the best we can.
I know just how you feel. We didn’t get our first home until our oldest child was 11 years old. We just couldn’t afford a home. We were living in California at the time and the prices of homes were way to high and of course they even went higher.
I have found through the years that I could be unhappy in the home we were renting or owned or I could choose to be happy. I chose to be happy. We had six children and we had three boys and then three girls and it worked out perfect in te 3 bedroom homs that we had. The 3 girls in one room and 3 boys in another room; they learned to share.
Just enjoy the moments; which I am sure you do. I love your posts.
Blessings to you!
Yes, but when life changes or you’re ready to move on to something new – oh the stresses you avoid in having to prepare to sell a house! Especially in this economy!
Great post. God has dealt with me on that one as well. I’m not even a renter at this stage of my life, I’m a live-in-wither staying with friends while my husband looks for a job. It all comes down to pride, humility doesn’t feel owed a thing and is so thankful for whatever shape the roof over our head comes in, that’s a hard lesson to learn!
Thanks for writing about this neglected topic.
My husband and I have rented all our married lives, and I grew up in a renetd apartment, so I don’t know what it is to own a home. My sister and my oldest friend own their homes, so I have felt “different” in my family, even though my parents never were able to buy their own home.
The funny thing is that – honestly – I really have no desire to own property – I guess I have seen the enormous amounts of money that go into maintenance and upkeep of a home, and you have to always be sure you have a considerable “nest egg” to fall back on should your home need repairs – and that is scary to me.
I also have seen how difficult it is to sell your home when you want to move – and I like the flexibility of renting for that reason.
The “down” side is that our various landlords have told us we needed to move out – sometimes with only one month’s notice (!) because they wanted our apartment for their son or daughter who was getting married. This happened to us a few times, but thankfully, the last time, we got 20 years out of the rented apartment, which is very unusual.
The main reason, though, which keeps me from wanting to own a home, is that, in observing my sister and friends who do own property, how the home comes to own YOU! Meaning that many times, the person or family’s lives come to revolve around the home – having that “dream house”, etc. So much energy going into where you live, that could be given to other things, such as the spiritual path.
I identify with the poster above who wrote that she is looking forward to her “dream home” in heaven! No upkeep there!
The grass is always greener…
We own our home and there are days I would LOVE to be a renter. The housing market here has tanked and we cannot sell our home for what we owe on it. We feel stuck. If we rented we could just give a notice and move. That sounds wonderful! Isn’t it funny how the grass is always greener?
My home, your home and this world is only temporary. Won’t it be great someday to have a real home in heaven? One that is FOREVER!