I look around our cluttered playroom and tell myself when it looks like the ones I’ve seen on Pinterest I’ll start a list of fun projects for the kids.
I look at my kitchen and tell myself when I can find the Tupperware lids and have invested in some decent pots and pans I’ll get better at planning meals and cooking with my kids.
I look around our backyard and tell myself when we’ve pulled up that corner of weeds and trimmed back those bushes I’ll spend more time out here in the evenings cheering on the impromptu soccer matches.
I look at our dog-chewed, baby-broken bits and pieces of crayons, mismatched markers and old pencils and tell myself when we have the right cupholders, the pretty boxes, the artsy containers we’ll use them more.
But the thing is. This is my one life.
I’ll wake up tomorrow morning and there will be three kids raring for me.
And the kids didn’t get the “we’re waiting on perfect” memo. They’re all about now and yes and let’s just do it.
They aren’t keeping score of how clean the kitchen is before we make the brownies. They are impressed by large cardboard boxes. And moms willing to crawl into them. Give them a tray of flour and their choice of kitchen utensils and you’re the coolest.
These kids – they’re not in a holding pattern until the house grows up and looks like I imagine a grown up’s house should look.
These kids are traveling at warp speed. Jackson will be seven in August and I’m done waiting on perfect staging.
I will hug his lean frame tonight as he climbs the bunk bed ladder. I will use old gold pushpins to let him hang whatever photos he’d like on his pinboard wall that was there before we moved in. And whatever he chooses to wear tomorrow will work for me.
I will tear off as many sheets of white construction paper as Micah cares to paint without once worrying about how to frame and hang them. I will wait till he forgets he painted them and then throw them away. And we’ll paint more tomorrow.
I’m over presentation. I’m going for participation.
This is your one life.
This is the memory.
Quit waiting for the perfect version because what if in the meantime the expiration date on that moment expires?
Build with boxes.
Chase them barefoot.
Pull weeds together.
And sippy cups work just fine for the art supplies.
YES! So inspiring. Thank you!
Yep–Just. Do. It.
Love. It!
I love this! When my son was little (now 24) I used to say that I might only get one chance to raise a child and I wasn’t going to miss it! He would not remember if my house was perfect and I had custom drapes that matched the cushions on my sofa, but he would remember the fun times we had together.
Thanks, Lisa-Jo. I just love you and your writing. It is so real!!
Mary
http://memyselfandmercy.blogspot.com/
It is so tempting for me to wait for things to be perfect to enjoy the life around me. It hasn’t worked yet so you’d think I’d stop waiting. I’m learning though. Through the gift of my child I’m learning.
Love, love, LOVE this, Lisa Jo. So very true! Waiting for perfection is chasing the wind–we’ll never catch it!
Oh Lisa Jo, I feel like we could all be BFFs! All of us women! and this is why blogging is so beautiful…stumbling out of our comfort zones to maybe reach a hand to help another that fell out of hers! I gave up facebook again ( this is like the 4th time) and I miss being able to “like” your post and comment causually. But I have you on my reader so I can keep up with your lovely posts! Pintrest ( I always spell that wrong?) is AWESOME but usually ends up remiding me how I can’t afford to make all these awesome things or how I cannot wear biking shorts and a sports bra and have glistening sweat all over my non ripped abs because of all the amazing recipes on there! :) and I don’t even dare look at all the stuff other homeschool moms make and use for their amazing “school” area of their homes because we write at the kitchen table, spell on beds and test on the trampoline…and it’s all good. Have a wonderful day with your babies, beautiful mom! Erica
We must’ve been on the same page :-) I know my kids couldn’t care less what the house looks like and care more about whether mom can play.
http://LifeintheWhiteHouse.com
I can not shout a loud enough AMEN!!!
Lord, have mercy on all our hearts– comparison to one another and seeking perfection are paralyzing, aren’t they? Thank you for such a beautifully written essay every struggling mother needs to read.
Lisa-Jo, once again you’ve done it! Your words have gone straight to my heart and you’ve confirmed things that I know God has been trying to show me. I’m a homeschool mommy, and as I’ve been planning the coming school year, I’ve been feeling God lead me in a direction I’ve never gone before—one that will allow me to actually enjoy our school year and not see it as something to mark off the list each day. God has brought amazing friends along who have unknowingly said things to confirm where God is leading me, and he has used you this morning to remind me that I only have this ONE life and I need to enjoy it and live it well! I love you though I’ve never met you, and I can’t wait to hug your neck in Heaven! <3
I would go back to those days in a heartbeat. Once they are gone, they never come again.
So true.
Phenomenal!
Thanks for the reminder! Love it.
Excellent reminder! Thanks!!
I needed this today. I have that same weed-filled yard (including a huge pile of sticks that USED to be a bush but has been a pile of sticks for more than a year now). My floor is full of crumbs, and I wonder if my guests should just keep their shoes on when they come in because they probably wonder “what IS that now stuck to the bottom of my foot??” because I do. My art desk is a mess. My to-be-born-in-October son’s room is still mostly a storage room. My kitchen counters never stay clean for more than five minutes and the kitchen table has been a “hot spot” and not a kitchen table for much much longer than I’d like to admit.
My 19-month-old doesn’t care. He doesn’t notice. He just wants to participate in every meal cooked and to run in the backyard and explore all those piles of sticks because they just might be hiding something cool.
P.S. I love your e-book :)
Thank you for the reminder. One of the reasons I gave up television and Pinterest for some time was to focus on my little babes. The discontent that comes with a crumb riddled couch suddenly fades away when I am in the midst of shooting bad guys and hunting “deers” with my little men. I feel a pull to unplug again. I don’t want to miss those precious moments waiting for perfect. Perfect is now. Thank you again.
True words!! I’m “behind” on a ton of things. A clean house being at the top of that list. We also haven’t finished about 5 lessons of math or 6 chapters of science for our home school year. But it’s summer. And my kids are coated in dirt every night from playing in the backyard. My 5 yr old spent this morning perfecting her ability to do a handstand while my 7 yr old VOLUNTARILY began reading his first chapter book out loud to his 3 yr old brother. And my 9 yr old read FOUR books in the Hardy Boys series yesterday. The dirt, the hand stands, and the reading are way more important than an immaculate house or those final lessons of math. After all, who finishes the whole textbook?! :)
Righto! Love this post.
Janelle
Praise God for the truth you just shared! I so need to hear it all the time.
Love you, Lisa-Jo!
Here is my favorite poem, that my mother gave to me at the birth of my first born.
Mother, O’ Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth.
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.
Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due,
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek – peekaboo.
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew,
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo.
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren’t his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo.
The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow,
But children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.
~ Ruth Hulbert Hamilton
Yes, love this! I’m a recovering perfectionist so I struggle with this – but time is short. My stepson is getting MARRIED on Saturday, for goodness sake! And my teen will soon have her driver’s license, and my baby is nearly 12. {sigh}
It goes fast.
Love this! I’m so weary of feeling the pressure to be Pinterest Perfect. Thank you for putting a voice to the thoughts in my head.
A-stinkin-MEN! I want my children to remember me, not my house.
That makes me want to dance! You spoke to my heart. Thank you.
I have lived my life in a holding pattern…my oldest two are teens now. “When I get older…when the kids get older, when we have a bigger house…” on and on it went. Now I feel too old, I STILL have little kids, and we have decided little houses (and their little house payments) are a blessing! So what was I waiting for? : )
Thank-you for this :) needed a gentle reminder on what is important on this hot summer day.
What a beautiful sentiment for all of us! I’m a soon-to-be-mama and I’m always grateful to hear things like this as I begin this new chapter in my life.
just yes, to ALL of this. Oh yeah, and thank you for making me feel better about the tons of paintings I toss a week. ;)
Love you.
LOVE this–“Quit waiting for the perfect version because what if in the meantime the expiration date on that moment expires”; SO true and such a great reminder. Thanks for sharing!
THANK YOU for this timely reminder!
Love your blog, thanks for keeping it real.
This one really hit home! I linked up to you from my blog. http://1familysjourney.blogspot.com/2012/06/perfection.html
B.R.A.V.O. My children never got that email either. Live for yourself and your family and no one else.
What a cute puppy!
Beautiful. Brilliant. Thought-Provoking. I’m going to share this post across all of my social networks.
Thanks for the reminder to stop waiting for perfect…and just GO PLAY with my kids already. :)
Thanks for this post. Boy, I can relate to this post. I think most of us have a love/hate relationship with Pintrest. I enjoyed your perspective on this topic.
You hit it right on! I struggle with this sometimes too. Part perfectionist, it’s one of my hardest challenges of being a Mom. To dive in head first without testing the water is sometimes scary, but my son loves it when I do. And that’s the only approval I need for this job!