It’s Friday, let’s write for five minutes flat. All on the same word: CHOOSE
The world spins in endless cycles of names flashing by in bright lights. And sometimes I’m dazzled by them and I think, why am I just sitting here in this minivan? I should get up and get going and make some grand things today. But my dining room table is covered in paints and crayons and a lost tea pot in just the right space, so I slow down and lean back in my seat in the warm car and crack open a book that reminds me how tomorrow’s bright names will have wall papered over todays.
And I will have lost today in the chase.
Genesis has whole chapters dedicated to who was the father of who was the father of who and so on and on for hundreds of years. No one remembers who was the better wood worker or stone mason or baker. No one recorded who was late to church or school or family reunions. The only thing that stood the test of time was who was the parent and who was the child.
This litany of significance hammered down in ink for centuries – who you parent matters.
We will likely all be forgotten a few generations from now. I have no idea who my great, great, great grandmother was. But I am Jo’s daughter and her love of chocolate runs in my veins. I am Peter’s daughter and his passion for the veld and the springbok and horse riding across vlaktes defines me.
I was interrupted from my all the things I thought important today when my son had an accident at school. And I sighed for a minute as I packed up my work and my books and my thoughts and then I remembered that some day someone will remember him. More than me or this talk I’m writing or the book that’s just around the corner.
Some day someone will know that they are Micah’s son or daughter and it will be the cornerstone of an identity that I helped shape today, from inside a minivan. History walking into the future from this very chip-packet and old, milk carton strewn car.
This post inspired by a chapter in my favorite parenting book of all time – Sacred Parenting: How Raising Children Shapes Our Souls
It’s so easy to get caught up in what we think our agenda should be and choose not to spend time being the parent! But you’re right–who we parent matters.
that is one of the best explanations I have ever read for all those genealogies in the Old Testament…yes…how we parent is huge…blessings :)
Oh my stars… yes this! “…who you parent matters.”
and I just saw your tweet about the tiny toy teapot (NOT the one pictured!) maniacally laughing… yeesh! #thatswheremightmarescomefrom
Pensive moment here Lisa Jo. As a step-parent, adoptive parent and biological parent (haha – that’s still pretty funny and amazing) I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about destiny and God’s hand in choosing me as the mother of the children I call mine. How nature and nurture work together to leave my unique mama paw print on them – marking them forever as Lisha’s children. I’ve wondered “Why me, why them?”, that sort of thing. But God has shown me in tangible ways why and certainly how He was involved in the choosing. What a blessing to know that who and how we parent matters.
So humbled and honored to have been chosen by God to parent my four treasures. A beautiful explanation of parenting!
Often I battle with “I chose this life” vs “this life chose me”… I don’t know what I truly believe but the idea that it is in our control to choose how we live seems a bit better to me – even though when things are not going right (like now) I know that it is up to me to choose to make it different.
I didn’t choose infertility but I did choose to keep trying – as hard as it was. I am now a mother to my son and that choice has been the best of my life. I wanted to be a mother so badly and I don’t regret it at all. What I do regret is the other aspects of my life that were placed on hold and now seem so far away from my reach that I don’t know if they are even part of me anymore – including my marriage, my self-esteem, my drive, my passion, my energy.
I gave all that I had to the journey of becoming a mother and now invest all I have into being a “good” mother that I lost myself and my connection to my husband somewhere between Doctors appointments, bad news, good news, trial and error.
I know to be a “good” mother I should focus on myself and my marriage too – to set a good example for my son. Show him what love is, show him how to be strong, brave and believe in his own self and to choose the right path. But I am just so tired of choosing to try.
What a powerful post. Thank you for sharing!
As always, a great post! I love reading your posts.
You are SUCH an incredible woman. Thank you, as always, for hosting something that builds each and every one of us up. ~Jenna
Ah, you get better every time! This is my favorite one you have done. Thank you. So beautiful.
I choose to get up this morning.
I choose to step forward into this day with a smile.
My day will be filled with choices, how I choose will define my day.
How I choose to define my day, with help define my week, which will help define my month and year
and eventually my lifetime.
By choosing to share my smile, maybe I can help someone else to smile, influencing their day….
FMF Feb 28, 2014
Choose Take II
I wrote a warm fuzzy post for FMF this morning, all about choosing to smile.
Right after that my 10 year old, deliberately disobeyed me, and my smile slipped a little, then he sassed me, and topped it off with a liberal dose of disrespect, at which point I chose to yell at him.
I then informed him ‘ I am choosing to let your behaviour wreck my good mood’
It didn’t last long, he got over being a grumpus, and I chose to smile again and we laughed together on the way to school.