20 Feb 2012

100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom

The last of my three kids will turn one next month. I didn’t expect I would be this sad or this gut-busting happy at every change in her either. There’s nothing like the baby year and the friends who encourage you through it.

This is my sleep-deprived and desperately grateful thank you to everyone who encouraged me through each of my three seasons as a sleep-deprived-deeply-exhausted-and-utterly-ecstatic new mom. This journey, it inspired a book, Surprised by Motherhood: Everything I Never Expected about Being a Mom and you can download the first 3 chapters for free over here.

And now it’s my turn to pass the encouragement on…

  1. Fold her laundry – especially all the socks
  2. Leave immediately when the baby falls asleep so she can nap
  3. Bring chocolate
  4. Don’t tell her to call if she needs anything, just drop by and help with everything
  5. Take the big kids out for a play date
  6. Tell her she’s a hero
  7. Bring her food in disposable dishes so she doesn’t have to deal with washing or returning them
  8. Don’t tell her to carpe diem
  9. Cry with her
  10. Laugh with her
  11. Share details of what you love about her baby
  12. Watch Up All Night with her
  13. Don’t tidy your house before she comes over to visit – it doesn’t help her to think you have it all together
  14. Tell her a day will come when she will sleep again
  15. Make her a 2am nursing station on Pandora
  16. Email her a bunch of fun deals links she can surf while nursing
  17. Make sure she’s actually in 1 out of every 1,000 photos she’s taking {thanks Natalie for being that person for me!}
  18. Take candid pictures of her in the new daily routine
  19. Bring diapers when you visit
  20. Offer to drive her on errands and stay in the car with the baby
  21. Be honest about how hard motherhood can be
  22. Text her encouraging messages throughout the day
  23. Come over and hold the baby so she can have her arms back for a while to do chores or cook or catch up on anything that’s driving her crazy
  24. Tell her to keep her phone on vibrate so you can call without being “that person who woke the baby.”
  25. Don’t let her become isolated in the baby cocoon – invite her and the baby out so she can reconnect with friends
  26. Never expect her to show up anywhere on time
  27. Bring her lip gloss
  28. Massage her neck and shoulders
  29. Run her a hot bath
  30. Don’t imply that breast feeding should be a breezy walk in the park; let her know it’s normal to struggle sometimes getting the hang of it
  31. If she chooses to go the bottle route, please let her do so guilt free
  32. She is just discovering the hard world of mother guilt – please don’t do or say anything to add to that burden
  33. Don’t share any horror stories related to motherhood
  34. Protect her from turning on the news in her first few weeks of being home
  35. Vacuum
  36. Bring fresh flowers
  37. Take out any dried up bouquets
  38. Paint her toe nails
  39. Tell her she’s beautiful
  40. Don’t tell her by now your kids were all sleeping through the night
  41. Especially if by “sleeping through the night” you mean from 1am to 5am.
  42. Remember that your memories of new motherhood have the romantic haze of distance
  43. Wash her dishes without being asked
  44. If you come over for a meal, please bring the meal and then clean it all up afterwards
  45. Let her know it’s normal to stand hunched over a sleeping baby just listening to them breathe
  46. Anytime she is disappointed by her new figure remind her that she grew a human being – that’s a miracle and turns out miracles need room to grow
  47. Don’t bring over any magazines that feature celebrities in swimsuits 6 weeks after giving birth
  48. Ask her what the one chore is around the house she wishes she could get to and do it for her
  49. Always bring your camera when you visit
  50. Print and frame one of the zillion photos she emails of the baby; include baby’s name and birth date {it blew me away when my friends did this for  me!}
  51. Bring toys/games over for the older kids when you visit
  52. Tell her it’s OK to feel like you want to quit motherhood some days
  53. But tell her that Trace Adkins is right and she’s gonna miss this one day
  54. Don’t just make a hand print of the baby – make one of mom and/or dad’s too for a fun comparison keepsake
  55. Bring her a Memory Keeper Box for that hospital bracelet, first lock, or even those first few pairs of shoes or favorite toys
  56. If she has to go back to work, assure her God will be watching over that precious baby. She is brave if she gets up while it is still dark to provide for her family
  57. Tell her pizza covers all the food groups
  58. Hold the baby so she can get a shower
  59. Bring over the Pride and Prejudice (BBC Series) boxed set for all those dinner {for the baby} and a movie {for her} months
  60. Ask her which baby items she still needs – get her those instead of the cute clothes you have your eye on
  61. Assure her you understand that while she might know that she’s walking on holy ground, that doesn’t mean she won’t still feel irritated how often that ground is strewn with cracker crumbs and yesterday’s socks
  62. Admit motherhood is one of the hardest things you’ve ever done
  63. Go ahead and quote that goodie-but-oldie, “It’s not brave if you’re not scared.” {Thank you Ben Affleck}
  64. Warn her everyone will have an opinion on how she mothers but at the end of the day, hers is the only one that matters
  65. Assure her motherhood is not graded; some days just surviving is victory enough
  66. Tell her that drive-throughs are the best friends of mothers-with-sleeping-babies everywhere
  67. Keep a pack of Thank You Cards handy in case she freaks out late one night that she hasn’t thanked anyone for all the meals
  68. Never expect a thank you card from a sleep deprived new mom
  69. Tell her there is no such thing as “doing it all.” And especially no such thing as “doing it all perfectly.”
  70. Reassure her that sometimes the love and happiness in a home is directly proportional to the mess.
  71. Send a special prayer, encouragement or blessing addressed to the baby via snail mail
  72. Turn the music up and dance with her and the baby
  73. Suggest that the greatest Pandora station for soothing baby music that mama can also love has to be “Winter Song” by Ingrid Michaelson and Sara Bareilles
  74. Take her (and the baby) for a walk
  75. Stock her fridge with necessities anytime you come over – like milk, bread, eggs, yogurt, ice cream etc – in case she isn’t up for grocery shopping
  76. Watch the baby for her while she goes grocery shopping
  77. Suggest she spend 15 extra minutes just reading in the magazine aisle
  78. Tell her it’s normal to be be smitten with newborn love one minute and weeping with tired the next
  79. Encourage her that a content household is rarely ever a perfect one
  80. Remember to always be kind to the mom on your flight
  81. Bring a goodie bag over for the new mom and not just the baby when you come to visit
  82. If you’re too far to bring over a meal, tell her dinner from her favorite delivery place is on you
  83. Tell her there’s no shame in cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner
  84. Make up midnight snacks for her to grab when she’s up feeding the baby
  85. Tell her not every photo needs to be perfect – sometimes the closer to real life, the better
  86. Give her the The Girlfriends’ Guide to Surviving the First Year of Motherhood for when she needs to laugh
  87. Give her Devotions for Sacred Parenting: A Year of Weekly Devotions for Parents for when she needs to be inspired
  88. Tell her matching socks are highly overrated
  89. Wash the baby bottles for her
  90. Tell her not to sweat store bought baby food, disposable diapers or pacifiers
    - whatever works, works
  91. Reassure her that perfect is merely a street sign at the intersection of impossible and frustration in Never Never land
  92. Tell her motherhood should come with a super hero cape, a really cute one with sparkles
  93. Buy her sparkly nail polish
  94. Tell her not to sweat everything Pinterest tells her she should be doing, baking, making and crafting for the baby
  95. Encourage her to embrace PJ days – even if they last for weeks
  96. Encourage her also to go spend two glorious hours at the hair dresser while you watch the baby
  97. Tell her about all the women who did all these things for you
  98. Assure her that just passing along the encouragement one day is thank you enough
  99. Remind her it’s the ordinary days that make the extraordinary memories
  100. Promise her it will just keep getting better

Go ahead, pass it on – encourage another mom! But kindly don’t re-post this entire list, just share a few bullets and then link back over here. Thank you. Brave, wonderful, you.

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Comments

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  1. 1

    love this! One from my experience would be to offer to have a sleep over or a late-late night visit with her so those nights when the wee hours that the baby is wide awake and seem never ending in the lonely, can be spent laughing or talking instead.

    • 2

      I think this depends on the personality of the new mom; for me, it would be stressful to have a friend offer to stay up all night with me and the baby because when my baby is awake, I’m tired and want to go back to sleep the minute he does!

  2. 3

    Such GREAT ideas. Thanks from those of us who are older and have a harder time remembering what it was like to have a new baby. And what we can do to help young women in this challenging and wonderful stage of life. I am printing this list to keep with me as a constant reminder! Have a blessed day.

  3. 4

    Love it! How soon we forget and now it seems like a lifetime ago, but reading this list brought back so many memories! I’ve bookmarked this list for future reference when my friends have babies…

  4. 5

    Yes, girl, yes!! My little man (and baby #3) was 1 in October and I agree with every single one of these!! Thank you!

  5. 6

    Oh how wonderful! Thank you for all these tips on how to bless my mother-friends!

  6. 7

    This is fabulous! Thank you!

  7. 8

    This is so great! My best friend is having her fourth next month, and this list gives me so many ideas! Thanks!

  8. 9
    Kate Battistelli says:

    Oh I absolutely love this list! This is such great advice for us all and as a new grandma, I think it so applies to us as well. It’s easy to forget what it was like with a newborn as the years drift far away from that time in my life. But with one grandson and a precious granddaughter due in June these are important things for me to remember. I am ever so grateful you put this together and I am printing it out to keep as a reminder. Thank you so much!

  9. 10

    This. This is what my heart needed this morning. After struggling with a sick 14 week old who refused to sleep last night. When hubs and I are also sick and the weariness seems immense and I feel like my pleas to God are being ignored and replaced with tests to see what we’re made of. I needed to know its ok to want to give up, but that we won’t and we’ll survive. Thank you.

  10. 11

    This was great, Lisa-Jo. Thank you for so many wonderful ideas!!

  11. 12

    Aparently, I am so sleep deprived I cannot even type my own name. FAIL. (In my defense, I was up in the night with sick children, *yawn*)

  12. 13

    the socks…they are terrible.

    • 14
      thegypsymama says:

      They breed, they hide, the divide and conquer.

      I hates them…

      • 15

        Amen.

      • 16

        Hey-we’ve been back down to two for 15 years now – and we STILL find odd socks. I swear they walk on outta the equipment. When my 3 were at home, I had a stack of loners about 12-18 inches high each and every week.

        Love your list, love your heart.

        Thanks for your words of encouragement at my place this week, L-J. I know how swamped you are, so that time is greatly appreciated, believe me.

  13. 17

    Love this! Truly, madly, deeply! We should all encourage our new mom friends with these great things! :) I laughed out loud on some of them!

  14. 18

    Love them all, but 17 & 100 are my favorites!
    :)

  15. 19

    Amen!!! So often it is the things we do, rather than the gifts we bring, that speak the loudest of our love.

  16. 20

    Thank you so much for sharing this list…I have an 8 month old and my friend is 6 weeks away from having her first one…I have learned many things and with this list I can be a great encouragement to her. I especially like # 17, 50, 66, 95 and 100 :)

  17. 21

    Great list! I love the “don’t let her become isolated in the baby cocoon”. Sometimes just a car ride with fresh scenery is the best pick-me-up for a new mom.

    I re-posted the list to the Preschoolers and Peace Facebook page. Thanks!

  18. 22

    Thank you for this, Lisa-Jo! As a friend to many mommies (but not yet a mommy myself), this list is going to be invaluable! :)

  19. 23

    You DO deserve a superhero cape for this. My baby sister – with a toddler in tow is having twin babies in about a month. I will use SO SO many of these. Thank you Lisa Jo, God bless.

  20. 24

    Lisa-Jo, all wonderful ideas! I’m not a mom myself, but many of my sweet friends are. I’ve bookmarked this list and hope to look to it often as I strive to love these ladies well. Thank you!

  21. 25

    Love this, Lisa-Jo! My personal favourite: Reassure her that perfect is merely a street sign at the intersection of impossible and frustration in Never Never land. Amen, sister.

  22. 26

    These are great ideas. Thank you, Lisa-Jo!

  23. 27

    I’m facebooking. I’ve got a 4 month old (my third) and it’s so wonderful and tiring. Especially those early weeks when she slept all day and then wouldn’t go to bed until after 11, 3 full hours after I wanted to! I might add, if this is not her first, take the other kids somewhere so she CAN nap when the baby does :)

    • 28
      thegypsymama says:

      Yes and Amen and Congrats!! Relish the sleep deprivation – it only lasts so long and before you know it you’re missing them when they don’t wake up anymore at night #InsaneAndAlsoTrue

  24. 29

    Wonderful – OH HOW I WISH I had had a friend like you to tell me these things with my eight! What a blessing you are Lisa-Jo – thank you so much xo

  25. 30

    Today has been a particularly rough day. I have a 16 month old and have been at my wit’s end for the majority of the day. Reading this, just made me cry… in a good way. I wish I had had this list for the last 16 months of my life. I wish more people knew the things on this list. Thank you thank you thank you so much for putting it up. Just reading it and knowing that there are people out there who understand, makes all the difference in the world.

    thank you.

    • 31
      Jennifer Young says:

      Javi – My daughter just turned one, and I have been at my wit’s end for–well, it feels like months. Some days I literally have to take it minute by minute. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. We can do this, I know we can:)

      • 32

        Jennifer, thanks for reaching out. I know what you mean by literally having to take it minute by minute. I keep telling myself “my mother made it through this, as did hers and on and on.. so can I”.
        Everyone tells you how awesome it’s going to be when ur pregnant, no one warns you about the hard times do they? :) But you’re right, we CAN do this. <3

    • 33
      thegypsymama says:

      Girl, put on that sparkly nail polish and repeat after me, “I am a super hero!” Because you are. Period.

  26. 34

    Just found your website and I LOVE it!! I’m a gypsy mama too… I’ll be stopping by!

  27. 35

    you are so smart and creative!

  28. 36

    I had my second child when my first was 363 days old, those are the foggiest, most stressful times I have lived but now that they are 7 and 8 – I’m so glad that it happened that way. Thanks for the list – it rings so true!!!!!

  29. 37

    love them all, but this one’s my favorite:
    69. Tell her there is no such thing as “doing it all.” And especially no such thing as “doing it all perfectly.”

    this is something that each of us needs to tell EACH of our friends — and regularly!!
    (whether they’re a parent of not!)
    there is such freeom from the Lord in this powerful, bondage-breaking message of truth.

    thx for sharing these wonderful ideas.

  30. 38

    Love these ideas! Several of the girls at work are having babies, I’m going to include midnight snacks with the baby gift.

    • 39
      thegypsymama says:

      Oh they will LOVE you – I LOVE you for thinking of doing that. And I wish someone would have done it for me – how fun!!

  31. 40
    Jennifer Young says:

    This is quite possibly the best thing I’ve ever read. Yes, yes, all of it yes!

  32. 41

    Lisa-Jo

    this is beautiful. Currently pregnant with number three and the flood of memories come back holding that firstborn beauty. I love how I shared this on FB and my non-mama friends have shared it as well. These are universal truths–it’s those simple loves on people. I might add that a sharing a 76 minute “shooshing” CD is also crucial (imagine one said husband saying “SHHHHHH” into a computer mic and looping it for 76 minutes when one said firstborn child wouldn’t get to sleep too well–hypothetical of course).

  33. 43

    Lots of great ideas. Most work well for new adoptive mums too – even (especially) if they adopted an older child.

    • 44
      thegypsymama says:

      Yes indeed – my parents have several adopted kids (youngest now only just turned 1) so I whole heartedly agree!

  34. 45

    Thank you for this wonderful and very kind list. I am a birth doula and would love to share this with my clients and their families. I am also the mom of a special needs child and can use many of these “love moments” on a weekly or even daily basis. Thank you!

  35. 46

    I’ll print this off to help me remember. My baby is turning 13 so I’m out of this stage, but these are great ideas to help me minister to younger moms. Thanks!

  36. 47

    This made me cry, for real. You are so right, especially, about not calling and asking if she needed help, but just showing up and helping with whatever. Sometimes when people would call and ask if I needed help, I’d say no just because I felt obligated to do a preliminary clean before people came over to help clean!

  37. 48

    What a wonderful list of ways to bless a new mom! Loved every one of these ideas. Thank you, gypsymama for sharing. I am well past the child-rearing stage and living in that blissful time of spoiling grandbabies (our 8th grandblessing is due next month). I do remember, however, being the exhausted mom of a 3 year old and a colicky newborn. One particular day, as I sat crying, holding my screaming daughter, the doorbell rang and it was a dear friend who walked in and straight to the kitchen and began tackling the mountain of dirty dishes in the sink. Though I appreciated all the lovely gifts friends and loved ones gave our new daughter, this one act of kindness was PRICELESS. . .and one I will always remember.

    • 49
      thegypsymama says:

      Priceless indeed! Half this list are things that were the most wonderful gifts to me and half things I thought at the time would have been a blessed relief to receive. Fun to pass both sets of ideas on :)

  38. 50

    There are so many that I love and will be using. Thank you for this post!

  39. 52

    I love this list! Thank you for taking the time to share these beautiful ideas.

  40. 53

    I’ve learned to keep a tissue or two handy while reading your posts! These are wonderful. Some reminded me of nice things that were done for me when I was a new mom. Others, reminded me that I need to do the same and pay it forward. I may come to your blog prepared for tears, but I always leave with a smile on my face. Thank you.

  41. 57

    Do you know where I can get the printout of #50? I love the type and want to do this for a friend.

  42. 59

    This is amazing. Seriously – You made my day. I have a 16 week old – a sensitive one may I add, and this is exactly the kind of support I have needed for the past 4 months. Thank you so much for being our voice! :)

  43. 60

    Love this so much!! I read it this morning while feeding my 5-week old. All women shoul read this, as it is one of the best lists of ways to love and bless each other! I pinned it, too, and over 40 people so far have repinned. Way to spread joy to the world today! Good job, mama!

    As for the socks- a mesh zippered bag works wonders at keeping them all together. :)

  44. 61
    Larissa Wickham says:

    I love this list bc I just had a baby. The only one I would have a hard time with is people just stopping by without notice. Bothered me to no end bc then I couldn’t sleep or I was in the middle of a feeding. I loved the working mom comment…. I have to go back in just over a week.

    • 62

      I totally understand! I know people are trying to help, but sometimes the thought of telling someone a “good time” to come over, even to bring a meal, was just overwhelming.

  45. 63

    Loved this!!! I need middle-of-the-night snacks that I could basically eat with my eyes closed, so I could quickly get back to sleep. Some of my favorites are bagels, nuts, and anything in a cup that I could just open, eat, and then throw out: applesauce, those little fruit cups, and pudding. Sorry environmentalists, sometimes you’ve just got to do what you’ve got to do :)!

  46. 64

    Loved this – thank you for sharing. :)

  47. 65

    I was excited to share this blog post on my blog here: http://emilyelizabethstone.com/2012/02/25/saturday-sampling/

    Love it!

  48. 66

    These are fantastic ideas! I would just add that it is always worth asking before you do anything (unless it’s bringing chocolate – you don’t need to ask for that!) especially if a mum has multiples or has a lot of help for some other reason. She can start to feel like she isn’t in control of her own life or like nobody thinks she can cope. Before you assume she needs milk and bread, ask – she might have that under control but be very pleased to receive cake! :-)

  49. 67

    This is wonderful! I am actually just EXPECTING my first, and so many of these things apply. I definitely have a disaster of a house because of the exhaustion and “morning” (all-day) sickness. Plus everything looks worse through the eyes of these crazy hormones. This is bookmarked for those special sayings I need to remember. Any other encouragement you can offer to (or advise you can give for encouraging) pregnant women?

  50. 68

    Thank you for this! I think my sister must be secretly checking these off. :) this list made me appreciate her a lot more. I cant wait until I can do this for someone else.

  51. 69

    I haven’t been a new momma for almost 8 years and I LOVED this post to tears! Thanks for writing it….really. It rocked.

  52. 70

    I can’t thank you enough for posting this – it actually made me cry…. although I couldn’t tell you why, other than that I’m 7 months’ along! :-)

    Can’t wait to share!

  53. 71

    I love this post! Such good info here. I will definitely think to do some of these as my friends continue to bring home babies :).

  54. 72

    What a great list! I have a friend who just had her first baby, and I have been thinking of all the ways I could help and support her. I think that the best gift for a new parent is definitely FOOD! And help around the house, and lots of love and support. It is such a wild time. Thanks for this great post…just discovered your blog and will definitely be back!
    http://theminddoeswander.wordpress.com/2012/02/25/the-order-of-things/

  55. 73

    I love this list! I especially love just simply doing things for your friend rather than telling them, “Let me know if I can do anything for you.” That not only makes your friend feel like she’s imposing, but now she has to think of something specific that she doesn’t even know if you’re willing to do.

  56. 74

    I LOVE LOVE LOVE this list! It is so sweet and thoughtful : ) I especially appreciated #40. As a new mom there was nothing more discouraging than hearing other moms tell me that their babies were sleeping through the night at 2 wks old…I felt like a FAILURE! Honesty is good, but it is important to use tact and discretion as well : )

  57. 75

    Great post! I am tweeting this one. I am 25 weeks pregnant and would love many of these things!

  58. 76

    i loved when a friend of mine, who already has grandchildren, would bring over a pack of diapers every time she came over with my last baby. it really meant so much in such a practical way! these are some great ideas. i always have appreciated people who have brought dinners the first couple weeks for my family – took pressure off me to cook!

    my recent post: never too old to learn something new!

  59. 77

    Love this! Wish I could stop by and clean up a little or hold your sweet baby.

    Instead, I’ll pin this for you! ;)

    a

  60. 78

    i love this, especially #2. a friend came to visit and when the baby fell asleep she STAYED and even acted as if this was what she was waiting for — now we can REALLY talk because the baby isn’t distracting us. meanwhile, i was SO distracted because i only have a few hours a day without baby!

  61. 79

    Wow- what an encouragement! I am not a mom, but an “auntie” to many.. my fridge is full of pictures of little ones and I’m blessed to read of the many ideas for ways to remember those mother-friends in my life as well as the new ones that have come along!

  62. 80

    Thank you for these words! I’m a mom two a two year old and a two month old. I definitely needed to hear some of these. And I can’t wait to pass them on to other new moms.

  63. 81

    Wow seems like a lot

  64. 82

    My wife gave birth to our daughter Ariel, our first, on 20 February, the date of this post. I just discovered your blog, and I am moved by your beautiful writing, your love of travel, and your wonderful encouragement. This list is getting printed out and posted prominently by my side of the bed as reminders for me. Good thing she already believes in mismatched socks!

  65. 83

    I’ve got quite a few friends that are new moms. I already had plans to cook one of them dinner tomorrow night, and then found this blog and realized how much more I could do!! I went out and bought cream, toothpaste, a new toothbrush, a loofa, bubble bath, razors and packed up some red nail polish to paint her toes red (the only color that makes you feel fun I think!!). Bought some milk, eggs, yogurt and berries (one of her favorite things to have for breakfast) and will be getting ice cream on my way over for dessert! I’m sending her straight up for a nice bath or shower so she can relax. I’m bringing my pajamas so we can just get comfy…and will be watching the baby while she takes an hour to relax, and I start making dinner. Her husband is out of town, and this was just such a great read!! I’m always at a loss of what exactly to do for new moms besides show up and spend some time with them…now I know that just painting her toes will make her feel good! Oh..and she will definitely be getting that neck massage! She just grew a human, and pushed it out of her! SHE DESERVES IT!!!! I don’t have babies yet…but I am so thrilled to know what I can do to make my friends feel great :) THANK YOU!

  66. 84

    I LOVE this! You ROCK!

  67. 85

    Encouragement for new moms I was suggested this blog by my cousin. I’m not sure whether this post is written by him as no one else know such detailed about my problem. You are amazing! Thanks! your article about Encouragement for new momsBest Regards Cassetta

  68. 86
    Vanessa says:

    love your blog. When my first baby arrived, I was elated and depressed at the same time. I felt i wont be able to sleep normally forever. But now, I’m doing fine. Thanks to my very supportive husband. Now that, I’m expecting again in few months to date. You blog just gave me a hope that everything will be just fine. And reminded me not to major the minor.

    Thanks. Thanks. :)

  69. 87

    Spot on! Thank you – will be sharing! :)

  70. 88

    Sadly, I had no friends during my pregnancy. (I had just moved when I found out.)
    I was also far away from family (14 hour drive far).
    I didn’t have anyone to do nice things like these for me, but I wish I had!!
    I definitely LOVE doing these things for my (now) friends!!

  71. 89

    This is such a cool list. I am going over to my friends house tomorrow to give her a manicure and pedicure before she has the baby. (due in 11 days) hope I make it before she goes into labor. There is so much I can do for her after she comes home. It been years since I had my children so this was just what I needed.

    Thank you so much for taking the time to do this.

  72. 90

    I think it is a great idea to help out with laundry, cooking, watching the baby, etc. However, I don’t think it is my job to help raise the baby monetarily by buying groceries, diapers, etc. I know part of the reason you suggested these things is that it is difficult for a new mom to get out and run those errands, and I would be happy to go get those things if given the money to do so. I did not make the decision to have a child, and so should not shoulder the financial burden of doing so.

    • 91

      Evie – Out of this whole list of wonderful things you can do for a new mom, you are criticizing bringing food or diapers? Then don’t bring food or diapers, simple! Lol. No need to criticize a well meaning idea to help out a new mom.

    • 92

      Evie, I understand where you are coming from, but I don’t think that buying a few groceries or a couple packages of diapers amounts to “helping raise the baby monetarily.” I would think of these as gifts, and even think of the gesture itself, of taking time to do these things for your friend, as a gift in and of itself.

  73. 93

    This is so great, I’m sharing it with everyone I know. I love new mammas <3

  74. 94

    Where can I order a baby frame like the one you show in the picture for #50? Thanks!

  75. 95

    This is wonderful, I wish someone would have said just one of these things to me when I had my daughter, I could have really used the encouragement! It’s a tough wonderful road!

  76. 96

    This brought tears to my eyes! It reminded me of how amazing and supportive my husband and friends were when I had an infant, and how much I would have loved someone to do the tings ob thislisty no one thought of. I am inspired and reminded how to love and support my prego friends when they finally get to deliver! Thanks for the heartwarming post!

  77. 97

    I love this! It made me cry. I am a single mommy and for the first year after my daughter was born my best friend would email me almost every day with just one sentence: “Tell me a cute Natty story.” It was a daily reminder of how very special these days were. And I always had a new story to share.

  78. 98

    Aww, this was so nice. I hope I can do a bunch of these things for a new mom. I know I could have used a lot of them done/said for/to me these last few months.

  79. 99

    #73- My daughter is named after that song :)

  80. 100
    Stephanie says:

    101. Vaccuum her floors.

    102. Don’t offer helpful advice for bickering siblings. Their lives are in upheaval too!

  81. 101

    Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful! Brought to tears by many. What a wonderful validation of so many concerns and insecurities that come along with motherhood. I have three children (3 1/2, 2 1/2 –13 months apart! and 18 months. I love the comment regarding perfection at the intersection of impossible and frustration :) And of course, so many others. Sometimes there is so much guilt associated with the overwhelming experiences of being mom; especially those moments of wanting to run out the door as your children are wide-eyed and desperately seeking your attention, approval, a hug, an ear, food, clothes, a diaper change….I know I will miss these days. I will never say they were easy. But they are magical. Thank you for posting this.

  82. 102
    Manderfly says:

    I cried as i was reading this. My beautiful firstborn just turned one month last week! It was tough, but we made it!! Thank You for the encouragement and awesome ideas.

  83. 103

    I love this list! My sis just had twins a few months ago, and I know that this list is ABSOLUTELY applicable.

  84. 104

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  89. 110

    for those of us just getting started off, is there any chance of getting some in the letters mailed in the past?

  90. 111

    These are great! I was searching the internet on encouraging verses to post on my daughter’s facebook wall, but I love the text idea better. She’s called me everyday to vent about her 6 week old’s lack of desire to sleep unless being held. She doesn’t shower unless she does it while he’s screaming. Her husband works crazy hours and is stressed on his job. The sad thing is she is over 3 hours from me, and the only thing I can do is talk over the phone. I’m looking forward to putting some of your ideas to work on future visits and praying that things will settle down for her. It’s hard on this grandmother, too.

  91. 112

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  92. 113

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Trackbacks

  1. [...] Encouragement   <3 Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like this post. [...]

  2. [...] 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom [...]

  3. [...] 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom [...]

  4. [...] 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom ~ I started to list my favorites, but there are too many! [...]

  5. [...] 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom [...]

  6. [...] are lots of ways to support a new mom. Just click on this list: encourage a new mom to find a few! Share this:FacebookTwitterEmailPinterestLike this:LikeBe the first to like this [...]

  7. [...] can be, and want to make life a little bit easier for another momma ?  Check out this post – “100 Ways To Encourage A New Mom” – for some great ideas…most of which would cost you nothing, but would be completely [...]

  8. [...] friends of mine will be moms soon, and this article from The Gypsy Mama is [...]

  9. [...] to Encourage a New Mom Saw this and wanted to share. I think it's basically amazing. Encouragement for new moms __________________ | Sindorella: The Blog | Just call me [...]

  10. [...] The Gypsy Mama recently posted a new blog entitled 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom. She came up with so may ways to love on a new mom I’d never considered. What is something [...]

  11. [...] 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom @ GypsyMama – These are good. Really good. [...]

  12. [...] 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom @ GypsyMama – These are good. Really good. [...]

  13. [...] is older, etc.). The list was originally written and posted by The Gypsy Mama and can be found at: http://thegypsymama.com/2012/02/100-ways-to-encourage-a-new-mom/. I saved the list in entirety here just in case the list got lost somewhere in the great, big world [...]

  14. [...] [like me] happens to be dealing with an infant, check out what Lisa-Jo has to say in her post about encouraging new moms.  Or if you know a new mom, check it out for some tips on how to encourage her.  My favorites [...]

  15. [...] then, the other day, I was reading this from Pinterest, and there was a link to various translations of this particular [...]

  16. [...]  Let’s pass around some new mommie love to others.  To go directly to the post click HERE and you can also check it out on pinterest HERE! Me with my new little one just over two years [...]

  17. [...] and proved that I am that typical, blubbering, sappy mom.  I found the reference on a list of “100 ways to encourage a new mom.”  The list was [...]

  18. [...] I was struggling with new motherhood, I read this article about 100 things you can do for a new mom. I think every church needs a copy of this article and a [...]

  19. [...] A couple of months ago I read this fantastic blog post by The Gypsy Mama about special ways to encourage new moms. You can read her post here, “100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom.” [...]

  20. [...] blog The Gypsy Mama fez um post ótimo no início desse ano com 100 coisas que você pode fazer pra ajudar uma mãe de [...]

  21. [...] shamelessly posted 100 Ways to Encourage a New Mom straight to my fridge.  This list just so so so [...]

  22. [...] Thank you to everyone who encouraged me through each of my three seasons as a sleep-deprived-deeply-exhausted-and-utterly-ecstatic new mom. I’m delighted to pass it on. Here are 100 ways I can think of to encourage a new mom…keep reading [...]

  23. [...] A couple of months ago, my friend Jody sent me a link to 100 ways to Encourage a New Mom. [...]

  24. [...] I shall always make time to encourage new moms. [...]

  25. [...] I shall always make time to encourage new moms. [...]

  26. […] otro día encontré casualmente en el blog americano de Lisa-Jo-Baker una lista con cien ideas para ayudar, alentar, apoyar… a una madre reciente. Aquellas que hemos pasado por ello, […]

  27. […] are lots of posts about how to encourage a new mother. I ran across one the other day that listed 100 great ideas. These posts are vital. (After all, do you remember how stressful and difficult those first few […]

  28. […] I was pregnant with Noah I read the blog post 100 Ways to Bless a New Mom by Lisa-Jo Baker.  Without shame, I printed the full article and put it on my […]

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