This is the tweet that our church’s youth pastor sent after our family concluded its first photo shoot in a decade:
Yes, folks, this beautiful picture, which was taken outside our church came at the cost of my chin, my pride, and as it turned out, a dangerous pair of high heeled suede boots.
Parenting is an interesting experiment, isn’t it? Just when you are patting yourself on the back for getting your crew well turned out with minimal conflict, the need to show off the “pretty” side of family life rears its ugly head.
For once you want to be the family that has it all together. The family that might not own a home yet, have done laundry in a month, or cooked anything more nutritious than mac ‘n cheese all week, but sure looks the part.
You want your kid to put down his freakin’ sippy cup and smile. And you are determined to chase him down to get that point across.
Truth is, no matter how we dress it up, we all have raggedy edges.
Two days after this photo shoot I heard the director of the International Justice Mission give a presentation. He said something that has stuck with me – if you want to serve Christ, do two things:
Tell the truth. And go where there is great need.
It made me think of all the many, many moms that plow through the unfamiliar terrain of raising human beings in a world that tells them they need to look, sound or act a certain way while doing it. An impossible task with impossible expectations. Picture perfect parenthood does not exist.
And I think that sharing our un-photoshopped moments with one another is as good a place as any to begin sledgehammering that lie.
Between these two precious photographs, Micah threw up.
And I caught it – in my hands.
Not because I am heroic, but because I didn’t want him to mess up the front of his clean shirt.
Yea, I know.
Jackson kept telling me that he was tired. That he wanted to go home. And he would not surrender his sippy cup. When I insisted he sit still, he took off running. Naturally.
So, against all my better instincts, I ran after him.
And I fell. Hard. My jaw connected with the pavement first. Then the palms of my hands, my left shoulder, and my forehead.
It hurt a lot.
And it was the opposite of pretty.
But it made me think about perspectives.
Family photos are all well and good, but the family members are a lot more important.
The image of motherhood is not nearly as important as the mother herself.
I now own that first truth. Inside and out.
I’m working on the second.
It was all worth it, because those photos are ADORABLE!
Ha! My chin begs to differ. (but you can expect a lovely Christmas card in the mail, wink wink)
Woot, woot! Look at that prominent placement! Front and center. Above the fold. Nice. I must also share from the official “Calvary Church Incident Report,” which I filled out myself:
Describe what the injured party was doing when the incident occurred:
“Lisa Jo was running with her children and fell.”
Describe the specific injuries resulting from the incident:
“She banged up her face.”
Needless to say, no action was required. The incident was simply noted. Perhaps I’ll make a copy and frame it for you. We’ll all be keeping a closer eye on Lisa Jo after church for a while.
Great post, as usual! Keep up the terrific work!
Ha! Mutual entry of the incident report. Nice! And I appreciate the “running with her children” as opposed to “running after them” ;)
Those photos are beautiful!!! Really, I’d say worth the skinned up chin and all.
Parenting is always an adventure… I’m thankful when it’s us who gets the bumps and bruises and not the kids!
Excellent point! I totally agree.
So sorry to hear of your injury! Hope you’re soon all better! Great pics, btw!
Thanks – other than my age, nothing else is showing to indicate the bumps and bruises.
Oh my! I’m not glad you were injured; I am glad you shared the story with us. It is so true about wanting to present the perfect image of a got-it-all-together-family, while truth be told we’ve all held vomit in our hands or scraped our chin (or yelled at our kids in front of the whole church during VBS…). Love it that you share the truthful part with us, and you did end up with a great family picture anyway!
The VBS image had me laughing out loud. Seriously! And thank-you for so totally “getting” what I was trying to say with this.
BwwwaaHaHaHa! Especially since I JUST yelled at the Tongginator on Sunday in front of the whole church. And the thing was? She was in the wrong, but I was totally over the top with it. I had to apologize to her later. And know that the whole church now thinks I’m a SPAZ. Heh.
And if I’ve learned one thing these last 4 years, it’s that motherhood is a spazz-fest of epic proportions!
Ow, that chin looks sore! But Jack and Micah look like darling little angels!!
I just cannot believe how big Micah is now! Lisa-jo, the photos, and your insights are so beautiful. I *love* being able to keep up with you an the boys here.
I spent the day yesterday running after/with three energetic little ones and had a wonderful time. But I ended the day of jumping castles and shark attacks and frog leaping and questions exhausted and thinking of wondermoms like you, who do it everyday! Maximum respect! And, of course, huge love, H
Thanks Cuz!
I LOVE when the SA fam drops a comment or two – how fun! We miss you all madly and think of you every time we savor some hoarded Mrs Balls Chutney with our lunch!
You will always love these photos the best, I think :)
Yes. In the same way I love my remaining baby belly ;)
Oh my goodness, your poor chin! Good thing our pride doesn’t turn purple too, eh? ;) Being a young mom I’m learning all of these things ever so slowly – but one thing I love seeing other Momma’s do? Laugh about it! Thanks or keepin’ it real, girl! :)
Yea, I always think it’s better to be laughing with one another rather than at one another. Glad I could amuse ;)
that was so good ! I am going to try to cut and paste the whole thing (pictures and all) and send to every Mom I know.
You are an amazing writer !
Thank you for making me feel better about my own “chin” and other issues…..
Jen P. in Palatine, IL (freeeezing here today)
I’m stealing this and printing it in my own hallmark card: “The image of motherhood is not nearly as important as the mother herself.” You have a beautiful family.
Aww thank you. And yes, they look lovely in these pics. But I think it’s the before and after shots that only I have stored up in my heart that no one else would appreciate that make them truly special (puke and bad attitude included!)
hi lisa-jo,
i will never look at any ‘picture-perfect’ family pics in the same way again :)
this really made me laugh.
thanks
love bron
p.s. i hope your cuts and scraps heal soon
Ha! Then my work here is officially done ;)!
And I love that your pastor hears “tall mom” and thinks of you. At least he doesn’t think of you when he hears “ugly mom” or “psycho mom” or any of those things.
WORD! I am laughing so hard thinking about all the other “descriptives” that could have been used. You are soooo right that “tall mom” is a really nice safe bet!
Ouch! It really looks like it hurt! I love humor you inserted between gorgeous photos of your family. Why do we all want to hide what is really going on inside on a daily basis? I do this ALL the time. I’m going to work on that….thanks for the challenge.
Thanks – it is sooo encouraging to hear I am not alone in the crazy!
Oh, I love this! You should have known that the perfect image caught in that fleeting moment could never last! :)
Indeed – but, sometimes it requires a face plant to really learn the lesson. Motherhood – tenacious education at its best.
Hi Cuz
It has taken me forever to work out HOW TO REPLY TO YOUR POSTS! I love your writing, the frankness and openess with which you address issues we all face. Thank you for being the voice for so many of us. Now that I have a voice again I need to find it so to speak and be brave enough to venture out there like you have!! Well done. Rob and I preached on about 22nd November – check http://www.nccb.co.za for the download. It was awesome to speak again and testify to God’s goodness and grace.
Love you
Kim
Hi Liza-Jo, ek wil net vir jou laat weet hoe geniet ek jou stories. Ek is mal daaroor om jou blog te lees – ek wens ek het meer tyd gehad, wil maar net vir jou laat weet dat ek darem so af en toe lees. Jy stories laat my so lekker lag!! Hoop om julle gou te sien.
Baie dankie liewe vriendin! Ek weet hoe kosbaar is jou tyd, so dit beteken baie dat jy ‘n bietjie hier spandeer!! Kom kuier weer gou!
Ouch!! Hope you are better by now. You have a beautiful family. I enjoyed your post at incourage, look forward to more. Happy new year to you and the family.
oh my how i love that picture! (and i totally thought i commented when i first saw this… maybe i just tweeted you. hmmm…)
seriously – i’m glad you were okay.