08 Aug 2012

A prescription for tired moms

I slipped out of my mommy skin tonight.

For three stolen hours I remembered who I am apart from the small hands that pull on me and the high pitched voices that only know me as mommy and not as Lisa-Jo.

I sat in a dark theater and exhaled the Destin and diaper changes and three am feedings as four women poured music into my soul. My friend, Anja, said it made her want to sing.
It made me want to fly.

To absorb the art with every pore of my body in that room with twelve other mothers sitting in our row was to be reborn in ways I’d forgotten I needed. Often Pete tries to remind me that we are more than parents. That we need more than parenting.

It’s easy for moms to forget that there is life outside of their motherhood.

Tonight I sat in my tired cowboy boots and woke up to the flavors of life I’d forgotten. I wanted to eat the music.

There is hard and desperate in the world. But there is also hope and joy set to music. And tonight both flooded my mama self and washed parts of it away until the me who helped make those children and isn’t just consumed by raising them emerged. The me who believes Jesus delights in the talents He gave us and that when we pour them out into the world He is filled with joy.

I believe there is nothing boring about the Christ-man who was there when His Father painted the world into being with just His words. He is the master artist, maker, creator, singer into life of all things.

Tonight I heard echoes of Him in the voices of the women who sang. And they didn’t sing a single worship song.

…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things. Philippians 4:8.

Run, my tired friends. Run into moments of beauty and truth and excellence wherever you can find them.

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Ukraine

Whether they be in the movie theater or a book store or a small art house theater. Whether they be in front of an easel, in your kitchen or your back yard.

Run into truth set to music and loveliness captured through a camera lens.

Whether they be at the beach or high up in a mountain crevice. Whether they be in an afternoon spent writing letters or listening to a poet. Whether they be in a coffee shop or a church.

Run and spend time remembering you were once a woman before you were a mom.

And I promise you will return to your motherhood refreshed. 

Comments

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  1. 1

    Thank you. I need that this morning. I’m needing to parent from the overflow of what He pours into me & have been limping along on prayers hurled up in moments of emptiness. I paused to read this as I was praying my way to working in the nursery and wondering how on earth I was going to do it. This helped. I’m going to try to listen to “my” music on the way to church ;)

  2. 2

    How wonderful. I’m so glad you found this moment.

    Cxx

  3. 3

    Oh this is so very true…I find that my most refreshing moments are those where u can savor something beautiful ~ whether it be sitting at Starbucks knitting with a friend, going to the symphony with my husband, or even going out for an evening walk alone. When I have time to appreciate God’s blessings it makes me all the more aware of the what blessings my children are to me.

    I love reading your blog. Thank you! :-)

  4. 4

    What a precious evening! Thanks for the glimpse into it – and the reminder to take some time away.

  5. 5
    Danielle says:

    Thank you so much for reminding me to find who I am. Not only a mother, but also a women!

  6. 6
    maddalena70 says:

    Men….. sister…

    :-)

    Maddalena

  7. 8

    Such a gift, a community of women who get you and can connect with you beyond the mom thing. I am going out this evening with friends and these lovely words will be echoing in my mind :)

    Loved this, Lisa-Jo.

  8. 9

    What a great reminder! Thanks for sharing this!

  9. 10

    Just yesterday a friend said that perhaps I should consider finding something that is “life giving” for me, besides my mothering/educating role. I know that it is true. Her words hit me in the heart, and I felt like crying! I just have to figure out how to get the time I need to do that.

  10. 11

    Mmmm. I am just closing my eyes and humming along with all of you as I sway to the music. Wonderfully uplifting!
    Dates with ourselves or with our friends are so important. Janice Elsheimer, author of The Creative Call, considers these absolute must-do’s to tend to ourselves so we are better equipped to both serve others and to discover the hibernating seeds of creativity we thought had died from lack of attention.
    Thanks for the reminder and the friendly encouragement!

  11. 12

    I love how you used Philippians 4:8 and challenged us to run and find these true, excellent, and praiseworthy things in our life! Beautifully written and graciously received. Blessings…

  12. 13

    It’s been only recently, three children in, that I have recognized what I ignored my own childhood: parents are people first. We have to choose to be the parents and we have to let ourselves be the people and we want more than just our children in life. What a relief.

  13. 14

    Great post…love that Philippians verse as well, so much so we have it in the nursery :)

  14. 15

    I laughed when I read… “Run, my tired friends….” because I just got back from a workout and started running again this morning; a new step in some much needed me time. I don’t regularly wear mommy skin anymore, but regardless of the stage — 1st-time mommy, empty-nest, career woman/wife, or nexGen mama-heart — it’s so important to remember and celebrate the woman He created me to be regardless of any roles that I fill.

  15. 16

    Moments like these keep moms sane :0). I recall MANY years ago, several mom friends and I gathered to go see a movie “Little Women”. The maneuvering that had to go on to allow 5 moms to go out on the SAME night! It was FREEZING and we did not care! We arrived at the theater and the people in charge told us they were not going to show that film that night. I don’t recall why, but one of the mothers simply PLEADED with them explaining that between us we had 20 kids and we NEEDED this break. They showed the movie and we were the only ones in the theater.
    I think it is really important for spouses to see this need and make the effort for moms to have some time here and there “off” :0). I am very grateful my hubby is one to see this :0).

  16. 17

    This is my favorite: “…the me who helped make those children and isn’t just consumed by raising them…” I don’t even have to follow it up with anything because it is all that it is. Thanks for that. <3

  17. 18

    Oh thanks for this. I tried to articulate why, but can’t put all the pieces together fluently right now. Just thank for your affirmation that we are more than moms, and shouldn’t feel guilty about that.

  18. 19

    SO TRUE! We get lost in this little world of mothering and forget there is other stuff outside in the wider world. When I was pregnant with my second daughter, I started gathering other women for a book club, knowing that I would need to get out among others once I had a new baby. It worked like a charm, and no matter what, we always get together once a month, even now five years later.

  19. 20

    Cheering for you, Lisa-Jo…glad you gave yourself, and others permission, to refill the cup of their lives, because if we’re honest, parenting, especially the early years, take a lot out of our cup…Blessings, sister in Christ :)

  20. 21

    “There is hard and desperate in the world. But there is also hope and joy set to music.” What pretty word pictures you draw. Good for you. I have tried to remind mommies younger than I that an empty pitcher cannot pour…and when mama’s not happy, NOBODY IS HAPPY. Blessings and congratulations on learning the lesson early. Teach it to your daughter. Teach it to your sons.
    God’s peace and good to you.

  21. 22

    I desperately needed to hear this today. I’m at the end of the day and mostly week, tired and worn out, and feeling like giving up on that life giving thing and just be a mom. You’ve encouraged and given me more to think about. I know God’s got me on a good journey, I’d just grown weary for this week of it. :) Thanks, Lisa-Jo, so much for your words today.

  22. 23

    Four of us go for pedicures once a month and it is lovely. You’ve captured my own thoughts exactly – I never realized that becoming a mom would all but erase who I was previously! We all work together, and it takes a lot of us, to remind each other of who we still are somewhere deep inside. Praise God for the families that form around us, He knows just what we need.

  23. 24

    Loved this! I don’t get many moments to just be, beyond mommy-hood, but thank you for reminding me that I do need that.

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