I go to Guatemala and a secret goes with me.
So new, so delicate, so unexpected I barely even whisper it to myself. I unwrap it on my birthday.
On the day I mourn half a lifetime lived without my mother, I hear Jesus whisper, “Life!”
Always He remakes. Always He knits together what is separated, fractured, to create wholeness. And isn’t this just like Him? To be going about His beautiful business while we go about ours, oblivious. Quietly in the secret places He works and plans and prepares a future for us that is spun from our DNA and His Spirit and His eyes never sleep and His hands are never idle and He admires His handiwork and grins to Himself in the wee hours while we sleep, and whispers His eternal refrain, “it is good. It is good. It is very good.”
And I am His creature who co-creates life with Him and when He ushers me into the secret it is on an otherwise ordinary Wednesday on the morning of my thirty sixth birthday and I will never forget how we laughed together – me at the unexpectedness of it all and Him at my surprise. And I wrap my arms around myself and know that the mother who isn’t there to wrap hers is wrapping them tight, tight nonetheless. Because she knows His goodness firsthand and sings with the Seraphim – “Glory, glory, glory.”
And in my upside down house I stand on holy ground right there between the open jar of peanut butter and crusts left over from breakfast.
A week later I go to Guatemala and the secret goes with me.
With the sun rising above the glinting jet planes I sit at my departure gate and do what I always do before I fly; I call my dad in South Africa. I catch him on his knees in his study. The fine line between his laughter and his tears is always blurred as he prays for my journey and I store up his words in my heart. His voice echoes all around me and cups me safe in the embrace of the Father that bridges the ocean between us.
And I don’t care what the other travelers think as slow tears make their way down my face at the long-distance blessing. He prays for DNA to be imprinted with this first missions trip. He prays for cells to be intertwined with service. He prays courage for us both.
I board.
We board.
And I know there is a heart of darkness that would eat the world if it could. I know about loss and separation and homesickness. I know there is poverty smeared across the faces of children and stamped into the hearts of the wealthy that only grace can erase. I know we live in a broken world that groans as it waits to be rescued.
But I believe rescue will come.
I believe it is already coming.
And sometimes it is heralded by the dividing of two cells. There is life and light in the darkness. And the darkness has not understood it.
And the darkness cannot put it out.
So I fly on the wings of the morning, His grace, and my father’s prayers to introduce the third of my children to that most sacred of opportunities – seeing the world through someone else’s eyes.
And I write it all down -our story – so that one day this baby will be able to read it all for him – or her :) – self.
Whoo!! Exciting!! Congratulations!!!
Congrats and blessings to you… both.
What a beautiful post. I admire the time you must take to weave such emotion and pictures into your thoughts, your life. Congratulations! What a sweet surprise. God certainly has a special plan for this child, and your family.
Welkom kosbare baba! Your life is extraordinary already!
Congratulations, Lisa-Jo xx
Dankie! Baie!! :)
Beautiful! Congratulations!!! Prayers for a great pregnancy!
Oh sweet Lisa-Jo – I am BEYOND excited for you and your family!!! Praying for a beautiful, blessed pregnancy and the wonderful joy of feeling life grow inside of you! Hugs (that will soon become real!!!) and congrats!
Your enthusiasm always wraps me up in delight! Thank YOU.
I will never, ever tire of hearing new baby news! Is there any more glorious sign that God is real and active and loving and graceful? Or of His fresh starts?
So happy for you, my friend! Beautiful news!!
PS You are probably the first non IRL friend for whom I’ve ever cried happy baby tears! Ha!
Girl, I’ma gonna take that to the IRL level SOON!
can’t wait to hug you BOTH next time i see you! and dang, you’re gonna make a baby bump look goooooood!
I feel this baby is gonna have a hankering for some ribs and chips something fierce :)
Oh , what wonderful news to read as I head to bed. I can’t wait to meet you both next month. :) I just love new”blessing” news.
Oh girl – thank you for joining me in the journey! It will be a blessing on every level to finally meet you in person!! :)
good grief….i am swimming in tears from this post.
amazingly beautiful!
wow.
and congratulations!!
Oh man, thank you. I’ve never had to share a pregnancy with so many before. It made me nervous. And more than a little shy. So your words – they are a treasure.
#SQUEEEEEEEEEEEE
This makes for some delightful sleep. Oh friend, I am rejoicing with this news!
AH!!!!! I am SO excited right now for you :) yay!
Congratulations! How exciting to welcome another little person into your wonderful family!
Congratulations! This is such a beautiful post. Best wishes & prayers for a wonderful pregnancy!
A wee little soul, and a tiny little heart, and I pray one day it beats just like his/her Gypsy Mama’s heart. For this is the rhythm of yours:
JE-sus.
JE-sus.
JE-sus.
Blessings upon blessings to you and yours.
– Jennifer Dukes Lee
Either it’s the hormones or your words, but girl, you got me all weepy and feeling so small and so blessed with that. Thank YOU!
how wonderful! your juxtaposing of death and life remind of 2 corinthians 4, that we carry around death and brokeness in our bodies that Christ may reveal his life in us–and in that literal way the most beautiful of all:)
Yes and Amen!
Ahhhh, I knew it!! :) Congratulations, Lisa-Jo! :D Grinning from ear to ear right now…and praying for blessings to abound to you, the new little one, and your family. :)
You knew it?? For reals?! :)
Well, I didn’t 100% know it, but I knew how much you wanted another baby, and then you said you had news to share and I just had a feeling… ;)
Lisa-Jo – BEAUTIFUL! You write the words here, now, but God had this written even before the foundations of the world! sending you big hugs! WOW!!!
Congrats to you and your family!!
I am smiling bigger than I knew I could. I love and adore you. both of you ;) congratulations, beautiful friend!
Congratulations, Lisa-Jo. What a wonderful way to begin your pregnancy – in service, in love…together.
P.S. How are you feeling? Any nausea? I had to fly in the 1st trimester of both of my pregnancies and – oh my! – let’s just say I’m glad that airlines supply those little paper bags in the seat pockets. ;)
YEAH!!!! New life is always, always a wonderful thing. No matter what kind of world new life is brought into, like you said, the life itself is evidence of redemption, Glory, God. I love the way you wrote this. Love the images. Love that you gave attention for the bigness of this gift to your family. Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
We are so excited for you and can’t wait to follow along via the wires!!
Lots of excited love,
Laura
Wow! So very happy for you! Congratulations, friend.
What amazing and exciting news!!! Hooray, hooray! I feel like I’m experiencing so many similar things with life in South Africa and pregnancy at the moment…but I love reading and hearing you processing it all as the beautiful story unfolds! Such great news! Hooray and hallelujah!
Such wonderful news! Congrats to your and your family!
Congratulations!!! How exciting! Are you feeling well? What a beautiful story you can share with your little one, how you were helping to bring hope to many little ones as God has given you one of your own!
Three is a nice number. ;)
Happy, happy congratulations to you!!! SOO excited for you guys and your family. And how AWESOME the prayer that your trip to Guatemala would imprint on his (or her ) dna. Happy, sweet blessings to you and Pete!!
AAAAhhhhh! Congratulations!!!!! So happy for you!!
The best kind of news…Congrats! What a fabulous blessing – the beauty of new life.
Congratulations, my beautiful friend! What a sweet secret to share with us. Praying for you, baby, and all of you! Much, much love.
Aw, how lovely! Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months!
What is a baby if not a reminder of God hope? A hope that is a sure thing coming. A joy. A blessing.
May this little one grow up to be a warrior who brings light into the darkness, just as the secret of his or her presence has already done for you.
Oh Dear Little One Known by God…
You who brought joy on grieving days and whispered hope in dark places, you who surprise and leave us laughing and gypsy around the world right from the beginning — we wonder at all He plans for a child like you and and praise God for your making, and murmur how we love you, one so much like your beautiful Mama already…
I am all blurring happiness, my friend, heart in throat…
I love you wildly, Lisa-Jo, a true heart sister.
Your mama dances today….
Smiling and spilling,
Ann
How exciting, sweet Gypsy Mama!!!! So thrilled for you and your family. :)
OH, Congratulations Lisa-Jo!!! How thrilling. I am beyond happy for you! Isn’t is something how news of life and death can’t seem to be separated? This is beautiful, absolutely. One of the most powerful pregnancy announcements I’ve read, because it’s so much more than that.
Congratulations to you and your family.
Thanks Elizabeth!n And I have have one more post I need to write on this. The one that echoes yours – the becoming full as a family – the waiting for that missing member completed. But that one will come with the baby I think. But yours words have stayed with me a long, long time and I am so happy to join you on this beautiful full circle.
Yahoo! Another Relevant baby in the belly :) We are in good company!
LISA-JO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What wonderful news giftwrapped among beautiful words from you. Your heart is literally singing off my page and I’m so…very…HAPPY for you and your family!
God’s timing astonishes me; He is so kind…so generous…at times, I’m humbled that He would so magically and mysteriously gift you (us) in the ways He does.
Your story is beauty; this moment is beauty. It is miracle and glory and testimony to the greatness of the One who knows us best.
This might be my favorite post of yours EVAH! :)
{congratulations xo}
Your exclamation marks are like love dipped in literary chocolate! Cannot get enough of them :) Thank you for sharing my secret with such delight. I was nervous to tell it, shy to share something so quiet and intimate with the world. And I’m kinda blown away at all the love in this place today. Thank YOU!
CONGRATS!!!! so happy for you, friend!!
Thrilled for you! There is something SO special about number three:)
SO thrilled for you! Tears of joy! :)
I have been wondering if this was going to happen. :) Ever since your post about being scared of having a daughter, I’ve felt like you needed one more. Son or daughter, this child will be a blessing in your life and an impact on your family! I’ve never seen someone announce the life within them in such a beautiful way. Already this child has touched your life. Praying so health and safety for both momma & baby. I love that you found out on your birthday, it’s like a present sent from heaven from your mom & your Father. I’m rambling now, but I’m so excited for you!! Blessings!!!
Yes, yes, and yes to all the above! :) My mom-in-law thinks a little girl would be good for us too :)
Guatemala reminded me of what I’d seen in Jamaica fifteen years ago. Yes, even in Jamaica. The photos of the children hurt my heart and wounded me. Permanently. Because it is a fresh reminder of what blessings I have and those that others do NOT have.
But now, there’s more! There’s joy! And happiness. And comrodery. I too am having a bundle of suprised joy! A surprise we’ll keep a surprise TO THE END. I happen to think its a wonderful surprise for you (and me) and I know what you experienced reached you even more.
Blessings and prayers,
Carrie
Congratulations!!!
Praise God from whom all blessings flow!!!!!! YIPPEEE!
Beautiful beautiful beautiful!!!!!!
You are beautiful and I am so HAPPY for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Congratulations!!! That’s wonderful news.
So many congratulations. My heart is dancing in joy for you and Pete. God is graciously good.
Amazing how happy your news makes me, though we’ve never met! Blessings, all through and hope you are feeling well.
What a beautiful post! Congratulations on your news.
So wonderful :)
Congratulations!!
How thrilling! Of all the news I enjoy hearing – that’s my favorite – always – unless it would be that God had sent me a million dollars in the mail. Just kidding. Beautiful, beautiful way that you told us in your post. I wonder how old your mother would be. I’m 59 and I have 4 adult daughters – my oldest is almost 30 – you remind me of them and your energy reminds me of their friends – I was 36, soon to be 37, when my 4th daughter was born. Aren’t you so blessed??!!!! Like the elizabeth ahead of this comment, I repeat her words, “Amazing how happy your news makes me, though we’ve never met!” I, too, hope you are feeling well and not too sick. Yet, even the sickness brings a smile, a reminder of those healthy hormones moving about in the creation process. I never tire of the birth of a baby. It’s so very grand.
Ah, such beauty in your words, such beauty in His promises. It is good, indeed!
The complex balance between life and death, between mourning and joy. Tears of both flowed simultaneously down my cheeks yesterday, recognizing one year since the loss of an unborn baby and celebrating at the same time the soon-coming birth of the twins safely growing (thank you, Lord!) inside my womb. In the Lord’s perfect plan, He took one home to be with Him and now is blessing us with two, who would not have come into the world if the first had.
“We’ll understand it better by and by”.
And for now, we trust, we lean, we receive, we grow, and … especially with you today, dear Lisa-Jo, we REJOICE!! :)
prayers for you, for the sacred little life within, and for the whole family.
After such a beautiful announcement, congratulations seems inadequate! Still, congratulations and God bless you both. What wonderful timing, too-during 40 days for life!
Congratulations at the joyful news. :)
Oh, what a giddy post to read! Lisa-Jo, I am SOOOO excited! 8 months ago I was the one with the secret (now he is very BIG and definitely not a secret anymore) but I can still feel the giddiness… Praise, praise, praise God for this new little life in your family!!
Love from Italy,
Well, that’s the most awesome pregnancy announcements I’ve seen, I think.
Congrats!
I think I figured it out when you said in the first line “a secret goes with me.” Call it “pregnant mama vibe” – one prego mama to another. Yay!
Glorious news! May God bless you and your family!
Thinking of, “And Mary treasured up all these things in her heart…” as you dream, and love and plan for this little one!
congratulations!!!
Oh, my! What were your words this weekend – jumping up and down and clapping your hands?! Well, girl, that’s what I’m doing, praising God for this sweet new life.
Amazing! He really makes all things beautiful, doesn’t He!? Congratulations, and I echo the prayers of your daddy for the heart of missions, a love of Jesus, to take root in that little precious one. Blessings abound!
Congratulations! Such exciting news, such beautiful words.
This is amazing!!! Congratulations!!!! I love your writing, Lisa-Jo, just beautiful and transparent…in all it’s transparency and humanity, it ministers to so many, including me. Thanks!!
I knew it weeks ago. So weird…I had a feeling reading a post one morning – so glad to hear that you’re pregnant ( my #3 took my breath away!!, still does, actually) – and I’m not just hearing voices…I am perceiving a Whisper – when I take time to tune in!! Also love that this is posted after your do-over post. Coincedence? not a chance!
Only one way to view this – as a BIG OLE SLOBBERY BLESSING!! WOO-HOO!!
Wow..Congratz!! What wonderful news
Oh my lands, LISA-JO!!!! Congratulations!!!! Prayers for a healthy pregnancy… and for two little ones to open their hearts quickly to a sibling.
Oh, what a beautiful miracle! Psalm 22:10!!!! “From birth I was cast upon you; from my mother’s womb you have been my God”. How wonderful that from the womb, your child could be a part of God’s work on the other side of the world.
I’m not familiar with that verse, Kelli. Thanks so much for sharing it – that was beautiful.
I’ve noticed a little common theme from these blogger trips …. babies (Angie, Molly, McMama, Kelly, you) and books (Pete, Angie, Ann)! :)
Congrats!!
Ha! I had noticed – until now :)
All these beautiful words and faces sending you love and blessing Lisa-Jo, and I add my own. I am so delighted. I love thinking of Him knitting away in secret, waiting to see the wonder and surprise on His treasured daughter’s face.
Hugs, from a grandmother who knows how joy fills your Mama’s heart over the news of this precious little one.
Aw, congratulations! Thoughts & prayers for you and your precious little one. :)
CONGRATULATIONS!!! Children are so beautiful, so wonderful, so innocent. Many prayers for a healthy pregnancy for the two of you!
Such jouyous news told by a beautiful, poignant post. Congratulations!
I am so happy for you sweetie…such a beautiful miracle and a blessing! :)
Lisa-Jo,
I haven’t stopped by here in a while (life has been so full!) What a beautiful day to come back! Congratulations, on your new blessing…and on your new imprint. My family has that same DNA imprinted on it…missions. And with each new move and each new chapter, it always seemed there was a new baby that ushered it in! I think it’s His way of sealing the covenant of blessing on your family! I have tears in my eyes friend, cause I’ve stood on that ground before!
I look forward to meeting you at Relevant and hearing in person, about your adventure and of things to come!
Kristin
Oh, Lisa-Jo! I’m in tears for you, friend! I’m absolutely thrilled for you and Pete and the boys. Three has been a wonderful, wild ride. (I’ll have to let you know about four in a few weeks… Well, maybe give me a couple months to get my head on straight.)
It’s been such a blessing to know you and to watch this new chapter of your life unfold. (A blog! A baby! Such gifts!) I know that God will continue to work great things through you and the ones you love. Hopefully we can catch up sometime next year when my circus heads to the east coast. Love to you all!
Oh man – we would LOVE to see your circus in person!! Are you guys moving back here or just visiting? And my three can’t hold a candle to your four – I don’t know how you do it. You are a wonder!
Lisa-Jo! This news, this sweet babe….wow, what a blessing! And just like his {or her} mama, he’s already been across the world and back. Praying to Jesus for a safe, healthy, wonderful pregnancy for mama and little one. Congrats to you.
Woohooo!!!!! Congrats girl, this is sooooo exciting! {{Hugs}} to you and Gypsy baby!
Oh Lisa-Jo – I am so sorry that it has taken me this long to get in touch with you to express the flying leaping CRAZY babyhappy that I have going on for you – but the crazyhappy is all kinds of overenthusiastic and excited:) I have been meaning to inbox you, but until I get around to it, please receive my HAPPY via here. I am so delighted for you, for Pete and your wonderful boys, what a blessing. I can’t wait to meet him/her (come on – has to be a little lady this time round, huh?), and to see all of you again. Sending so very much love and my prayers for a very special and unnauseous pregnancy, *love*
Oh congratulations! What a special time for you and all the things surrounding it! Thanks for sharing it with us to beautifully!
Hi Lisa Jo,
I am number 96 to congratulate you with this wonderful news! I am very happy for you and Pete and your two beautiful boys. What if they got a little sister to pet and pamper….or a third little brother to play with….how wonderful! Three is a crowd they always say and boy do I see that with my best friend here in the Netherlands, she has three girls and they have big fun but life is sooo busy with three little mouths to feed! I wonder how your life will be affected, more potty training and breakfast tables full of crumbs….and won’t you love it all. Blessings to your family and congrats on your blog, how you find the time to write so much beautiful stuff I do not know, but do know somebody on the other side of the Atlantic is very much enjoying following your family! I am in touch with Nazreen as well again who is now remarried and trying to have kids herself and about to get her doctorate as well!
Love and hugs!
Selina
aaaahhhh!!!!!!!! sooooo exciting!! Blessings on you!!! What wonderful, wonderful news! Praise God for His perfect timing! Kelly
Beauty, absolute beauty! This morning I needed to read about light overtaking the darkness. Congratulations! God is good, and His goodness comes with this fresh new one. :)
Oh my goodness!!! Congratulations!!! I am so late to this wonderful announcement, but heartfelt best wishes just the same!! :)
I just read your most recent post & said….”Huh? What? Did I miss something??”…lol, I sure did! Wonderful news, Lisa Jo!!!
CONGRATULATIONS!!! The Lord is so good! I am due on December 5th and I’m really thanking Him for this amazing blessing. I don’t know why, but the second time around for me has been so much more about being thankful and praying for health and peace and strength. I guess it’s because I’ve grown a bit since last baby, spiritually and intellectually, and I’ve grown in His light, on His path. I’ve grown closer to our Lord and he’s given me this amazing gift…and it is such a gift, delicate and easily fractured. PRAISE GOD for your newest addition, your newest gift!
Wait – your PREGNANT! Whooooo hoooooo! So excited for you!!!!
Lisa-Jo, I’m so happy for you! :)
*hugs*
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
EEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
I’m gonna get to hug you and that sweet little belly of yours SO SOON and I can not wait.
Glory! Glory! Glory! God is marvelous to craft something so miraculous inside and it grows in love, made in love, and will be nurtured in deep soul-Jesus-love.
Lisa-Jo!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH
HUGE smiles today!
Sending you a virtual {hug}, congratulations!!!
Yay Lisa-Jo!!! I’m so happy for you! I cant wait to read all of your baby posts! So excited to be on this journey with you!